Before I became a dad, that was the one single thing that I feared the most. I could not imagine being responsible for another human being. In my early and mid twenties I could barely take care of myself.
My plan was simple. Avoid parenthood at all costs. Go back to school, get a job,go back to school and everything else in between. Being a parent wasn’t in my bucket list.
As you can imagine, in my late twenties, that one thing I feared the most became a reality. In March of 2017, I was a father to a son. The moments leading to this had me terrified.
I had everything prepared. Being in the medical field had given me an idea of what to expect, and how to handle it. I had seen in my line of duty what you need immediately, in the short term and later in infancy.
Dad Meet Son…
Funny thing though, our first encounter wasn’t as I had imagined. I was not afraid or confused. On the contrary, I was elated. In that little cot lay a tiny pink human being, a product of two people who loved each other immensely. And that love would now be extended to this bundle of joy. It was an amazing first encounter.
His big baby eyes looked deep into my soul. His tiny little fingers melted my heart every time they touched mine. His baby scent was intoxicating.
I couldn’t sleep if he was restless or unwell. His pain was my pain. He was basically an extension of me. I felt what he felt. I even anticipated it at times. I was unwell if he was sick. We were like siamese twins.
I don’t understand it when people say fathers aren’t connected to their kids as their mothers. I don’t know the level of connection mothers have to their kids, but we as fathers have a deeper connection that can’t be put into words. It can go beyond even the connection we have to our partners.
Sacrifice.
I have learnt a few things since I became a dad. The most important one; you don’t live for yourself, you live for him. You cannot let him lack anything. You make sacrifices for him.
You work harder and smarter to make sure he has a fairly comfortable life. He gets the best food, toys and school I can afford.
As fathers, our sons are our greatest weakness. You touch him, you touch the apple of our eyes.
Me, My Son And His Mom 